The expectation.

por Vough

Somehow you became as big as the high cloudy sky this fall gave to the city where I live in, where I grew up, where I met my best friends and where my heart broke. Somehow you were able to push me apart of my comfort zone, as I am not comfortable around you, I only feel nervousness and become awkward whenever you are around. Somehow you make me want to go for it, to lose my fears, to accomplish my dreams, to achieve my goals. Your twenty-one year old self just makes me feel exhilarated by the fact I have met you this time, this moment, nowhere else, and no other time or aspect of life. Your skin, with your freckles and your scars, and I do not forget your new tattoo -of course-, makes me forget what dignity means, makes my foundations tremble, makes my personality discover itself new features, never known beforehand. Your anatomy drives me to different dreams, with such variety, colours and feelings that my soul cannot understand and think rationally anymore. Your ethics and thinking take me to so many pathways unexplored to my naïve eyes, which have not grown to become fully adapted to your existence yet. Anyhow, your concepts and your eyes make me express in different manners. The attraction your body and soul unfold to me is something I have never, ever, experienced before. And I do not want to lose that. I would love to become your adventure partner. I would die to be the guy you want for your eternal journey. And still, everything becomes unexpected. The secrets keep hindering us to be utterly expressive to each other. And, call me kamikaze, nonetheless, I somehow like the expectation of the unknown, of what could be. You make my hopes go high as the sky and low as the earthworm, as my discipline, and my honour, when your sole appearance is in front of me. You make me sigh. You make me live fiercely. You make me die and rebirth.